“News”letter for 2017.12.16

Activities since last newsletter: I bought a car. It tells me what song is playing on the radio. My previous car didn’t have that, so it’s a big deal to me!

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.12.09

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.12.16

Article: Oh, New Jersey...

Gif: Penguin jump!

“News”letter for 2017.12.02

Activities since last newsletter: Whatever was holding my car’s catalytic converter in place rusted off, so I was told I will have to get a new catalytic converter for my car, or buy a new car. My car is 13 years old, so...hello new car?

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.11.25

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.12.02

Article: Learn about penguin anatomy!

“News”letter for 2017.11.18

Activities since last newsletter: I watched a lot of animal gifs because animals are cute.

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.11.11

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.11.18

Tweet list: Hilarious criticism of The Cheesecake Factory

“News”letter for 2017.11.04

Activities since last newsletter: I was using the Bumble app and found my ex-girlfriend. How’s your dating life going?

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.10.28

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.11.04

Article: How was I not invited to this

“News”letter for 2017.10.21

Activities since last newsletter: Nothing of note. Oh well!

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.10.14

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.10.21

Article: Celebrity penguin passes away

Article: For people who want a cat but are not allowed to have a pet at home

“News”letter for 2017.10.07

Activities since last newsletter: I went to New York Comic-Con on Thursday. I don’t have a funny story about it, but I thought I’d mention it.

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.09.30

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.10.07

Link: Post office next to penguins

“News”letter for 2017.09.23

Activities since last newsletter: I went to San Francisco to see two friends. A female dog kissed me on the lips. I had avocado toast.

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.09.16

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.09.23

Amazon: An essential book

Link: Should I get this for Penguin so I know where he is when he goes fishing?

“News”letter for 2017.09.09

Activities since last newsletter: No more summer Fridays for me, no getting out at 2 PM anymore. Also, I’m taking a quick vacation this Wednesday, haven’t traveled anywhere since December last year.

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.09.02

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.09.09

Article: Happy dog

“News”letter for 2017.08.26

Activities since last newsletter: I saw a solar eclipse. It was neat. Next one on April 8, 2024!

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.08.19

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.08.26 (includes the eclipse!)

FB post: I took a picture of the eclipse with my phone

FB Post: I bought a good tissue box

Tweet list: Tweets about yesterday’s boxing match

“News”letter for 2017.08.12

Activities since last newsletter: This is very late so I forget.

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.08.05

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.08.12

Article: Moo?

Article: Trail guide: llama!

Article: Penguin is a mascot for...what?

“News”letter for 2017.07.29

Activities since last newsletter: I found 8 year old chocolate candy in my fridge. It tasted ok.

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.07.22

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.07.29

“News”letter for 2017.07.15

Activities since last newsletter: I got a crown installed over my broken tooth on Tuesday, so I can eat anything I want! I went almost a month with a broken mouth...so keep good care of your teeth! Or they will take their revenge on you.

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.07.08

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.07.15

Article: KFC opens a healthy restaurant...not in America

“News”letter for 2017.07.01

Activities since last newsletter: I went to the dentist who told me I needed a root canal. Got that two days later. Back to the dentist a week after the first visit for a temporary crown. Now I have to wait two weeks for the permanent one. The Lesson: Don’t crack a tooth!

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.06.24

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.07.01

No funny articles this time, sorry!

“News”letter for 2017.06.17

Activities since last newsletter: I cracked a tooth on Thursday. Dentist next week it is!

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.06.10

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.06.17

Article: Hell is this home

“News”letter for 2017.06.03

Activities since last newsletter: I drove my sister and her husband to the airport on May 27 (Saturday before Memorial Day). Unfortunately they were flying British Airways and this happened. Their flight back home ended up being delayed more than 24 hours!

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.05.27

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.06.03

Tweet list: Covfefe, part 1

Tweet list: Covfefe, part 2

Tweet list: Covfefe, part 3. Yes I found this many tweets to make 3 parts.

Article: Cycling...underwater?

Article: I have to compete with this guy when online dating??? I’m screwed!

Article: I could have been on “The Bachelorette” this season???

Article: First name: Fluffy

Product Link: Fidget spinner has bluetooth speaker built in

Article: Minion fries are a thing

“News”letter for 2017.05.20

Activities since last newsletter: I got an Apple Watch. I ordered it from Target.com on May 8th, it shipped on the 10th, and I received it on the 19th. Do not order anything from Target.com unless you have no other choice, please. No one should wait 9 days for a package.

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.05.13

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.05.20

Article: The Pittsburgh Penguins had a penguin

“News”letter for 2017.05.06

Activities since last newsletter: I slept better than usual!

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.04.29

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.05.06

Article: Penguin has issues

Article: Penguin restaurant (they are entertainment, not food)

Article: You can rent a llama for your wedding in Portland, Oregon

Article: Speed bumps...for people?

“News”letter for 2017.04.22

Activities since last newsletter: I’m still coughing. It’s been three weeks now. Also, I bought a guitar. I own three electric guitars. I still don’t know how to play a guitar, but I like how they look. Lastly, I mailed two of my three cell phone sim cards (yes I have three) to my sister in Norway so when she and her husband fly to America next month for a wedding, they’ll have cell service immediately upon landing (they are not flying into my area so I cannot meet them at the airport).

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.04.15

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.04.22

Article: Squirrel has daily routine

Article: Why would someone steal this?

“News”letter for 2017.04.08

Activities since last newsletter: I got a sty above my right eye, then a canker sore in my mouth, and then I got a sinus infection (which I am working through now). So it’s been a terrible two weeks. Hope yours was better!

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.04.01

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.04.08

Article: Very negative review of expensive restaurant

Tweet: Watch a baby manatee drink from a bottle

“News”letter for 2017.03.25

Activities since last newsletter: I went to a wedding ceremony but not the dinner party because the party was not near public transit.

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.03.18

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.03.25

Article: I have never laughed more than when reading this article

Article: This is the second hardest I’ve laughed while reading an article

Article: Mad cow

“News”letter for 2017.03.11

Activities since last newsletter: I got the new Nintendo! Separately, I’m likely getting a foot of snow or more on Tuesday!

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.03.04

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.03.11

Article: Cow has own island

Tweet list: Academy Awards fiasco part 1

Tweet list: Academy Awards fiasco part 2

Link: This is a real eBook on Amazon.com

“News”letter for 2017.02.25

Activities since last newsletter: I can’t get into my flickr account and I don’t know why.

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.02.18

Tweet list: Tweets for the week of 2017.02.25

Article: Someone bought a pig

Tweet list: Cow on the loose in NYC

“News”letter for 2017.02.11

Activities since last newsletter: Realizing how badly I sleep if I drink alcohol shortly before going to bed. Also, it snowed 8 inches on Thursday and I got to work from home. I woke up at 10:50 AM that day. It was nice.

Tweet list: Tweets from the past two weeks

Tweet list: Super Bowl tweets!

Article: Florida man...does something good? but is for naught...

Article: Cat hotel?

“News”letter for 2017.01.28

Activities since last newsletter: It’s been a long weekend and I can only drink so much tequila, see story #2...

Tweet list: Tweets from the past two weeks

Tweet list: A very very long list of tweets about President Trump’s Executive Order this past weekend (obviously political, do not click if you like his EO)

Tweet list: Refugee/Green Card stories (some doozies in here)

Article: Real Dumb Guy Throws Himself Into Giant TV After Cowboys Lose

Article: Cow just wanted to swim

“News”letter for 2017.01.14

Activities since last newsletter: My work supervisor has changed 7 times in the last year. Also, I drank a crystal Pepsi.

Tweet list: Tweets from the past week

Tweet list: 150 Livestock Lessons

Article: The hero America needs: ...a Pennsylvania woman drove into a river...and continued drinking beer as she floated in the vehicle.

Article: Remember that elevated bus in China?

Article: Florida Maid of Honor Ruins Wedding